Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
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