We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Of course I have a pirate flag
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
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