My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
