Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
