Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
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