I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Randomize
