I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Randomize
