i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
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