She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
