It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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