And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Randomize
