Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize
