He kissed a someone with a penis
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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