is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Randomize
