hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Randomize
