party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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