i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
There's even glitter on my cock...
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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