sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Randomize