I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
