Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Randomize
