Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
