why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
