I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Even my vagina gasped.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
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