"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Randomize
