i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
