Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
