Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
