Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
