I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
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