i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
