I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Randomize
