I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
we're chasing vodka with high fives
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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