he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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