well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
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