I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Randomize