do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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