toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
