hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
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