i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize