i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize