He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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