Kiss
Puke
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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