You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Randomize
