I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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