oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Randomize
