What tipped you off? The sombrero?
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
