I just made out with a guy for $7.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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