I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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