Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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