that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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