He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize