Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
